Rest For The Weary II

I wanted to present some cases on why people irrate me.

Case One:

I went to the store to get some groceries about two weeks ago. It was a Friday, Paul and I had a bad fight the night before, I didn't sleep (never sleep after a fight) and had to work. So, I'm at the grocery store. I have my cart dragging behind me (that's the way I roll. LOL) coming out of the checkout lane. Here's these two kids I have to avoid, then their Dad throws a cart in front of me. I WAS PISSED! I said; " Excuse me! " He's like, "Oh, I'm sorry." Okay, firstly, watch your children. Why are they running harry karry in a store? I would've gotten my backside tanned for running around! Second, why are you throwing your cart into this area at the end of the check outs? That's NOT where the cart goes! Why the he** would you throw it carelessly in front of me?

Case Two:

The people who sit at green lights. Let me say it..."IT'S NOT GETTING ANY GREENER!" MOVE! Holy friggin heck. Don't hold traffic up because you're asleep at the wheel!

It gets worse. Paul has people tell him stupid stuff all the time. I just don't understand that. So, stupidity running and the abuse I've endured have made me have a heavy dislike of people.

Sighs

Rest For The Weary

They announced today at work that we are free from mandatory overtime. That is, until the world decides they need more Viagra... (inside joke, sorry)

I'm looking forward to having the week off from O.T. I hate hate feeling like someone owns me. It bothers me ALOT! That's kinda what a company gets to do when they demand overtime, donja think?

I've been analyzing myself over the weekend.

I have a true hate on for people. (Do you ever watch "House"? I'm kinda like that) I don't like anyone that I don't know. I think the animosity comes from working for a credit card collection agency for two years and my life experiences with people. I know that a person is smart. People, as it was said in "Men In Black" are stupid, panic, irresponsible, inconsiderate...

I'm not saying I'm superior. No way. I have my moments when I'm stupid. I'm talking, when I am out in a store, I see this stuff. When I'm driving. Sitting in a public place. Stupid. Inconsiderate. Irresponsible PEOPLE!

TBC...

Curves

Let's talk FAT.

It's a sensitive subject among women. It is. If the woman asks; "Honey, do I look fat?" MEN SAY : "No, of course not.", "Baby, I love you.", "That's a really sensitive subject. Do you think you're fat?" or kiss her move the conversation away from that question. Actions speak louder than words, gentlemen.

My husband got in the doghouse over the weekend for seeing the "curvy characters" commercial on USA and then seeing the Quintiles commercial for a weight loss study and said, there you go baby, it's $4000 in compensation. Picture me looking at him, distain in my eyes. He said he was just joking, but he's one of those guys who need to warn you that they are about to say something they think is funny. What do they call that? Or yeah, dry humor. NO ONE CAN TELL WHEN YOU'RE JOKING !!!

But I am making a big deal recently about my weight. Why? When I moved up to Ontario I was an unhealthy 187 pounds. Don't ask. I was working a desk job and didn't really give a sh**. When I moved down to Missouri from Ontario (after helping out in barns the whole time up there) I was 135 pounds. It's frustrating. But you get busy, you get a desk job, you get tired, you stop caring.

USA network shows a commercial for their "character" thing of women in the spotlight who have "curves". (Paul argues that I am wrong in my rant here, but to he** with him) These are women who are technically overweight. Technically obese. Technically. I say this due to the Wii Fit. And this site: www.icb2001.com/icbBMI1.asp At almost 185 pounds I am obese. (I should be between 111 to 150 lbs) I don't feel that way. I look in the mirror and can say that I am overweight, but not obese. So, why, why would you glamourize these women? Oh yeah, to make your simple minded audience think you think that overweight folks are okay. Super skinny folks aren't, but obesity causes alot of heart issues. Super skinny folks are bound to have issues too, but why glamourize the fatties? Peeves me.

Second issue: Quiznos commercials. Toasty Torpedos. If you don't have a Quiznos and see the commercials, check out www.youtube.com/watch?v=7LQpRQh2KSQ OMGWTF?! Were the advertising people, management, the sales team or the whole freaking building on drugs? (Maybe it was ecstasy!) This is freaking disturbing! I haven't spoken to one single person at my office that find it amusing without finding it also very very gross. Yes, it's funny. But the link I've provided was actually the commercial that my brother in law saw and pointed out that the employee looks at his crotch when he said he burned! Uh, ew.

It's almost bedtime.

Anger

Anger.

Define anger.

dictionary.com says: a strong feeling of displeasure

I got upset today because of a bad restuarant. Upset. Not angered. And I was accused of being angry. I have sent a complaint to said resturant's corporate office. The resolution they will come up with? A chinzy phone call to apologize or a letter in the mail accompanied by a free meal. If they're good, they will lecture the manager that screwed up and the training will start.

But this is the point: This is the answer for bad customer service that has gone down since the 1950's. And as far as I know, before that.

I notice this. It irks me.

I watched two boys, twins, didn't know how to handle a full resturant wait with the puzzling conundrum of seating a group of thirteen and another ten people waiting to be seated in smaller groups. And held multiple tables while they gave this customer his choice of where he wanted his enormous party to sit. Then they held the tables that the customer turned down instead of seating the others on the wait! Then, some men walk in and get seated right away. The twins tell me that they take reservations. THIS IS A FAST FOOD RESTUARANT for all intents and purposes. They don't take reservations. Agast, I asked for the proof of this reservation and the boy pointed to a table seating for 2 when they sat 3 men. I'm not stupid. Don't lie to me. It'll cost you a nasty lecture from your boss.

Someone, fix customer service. I hate being out among idiots.

- Chelle

Darkness

I was staring at my soaps that I have in our bathroom. Oatmeal. Caught my eye. Soaps, candles, incense.

Darkness.

The darkness surrounded me when I came of age. I realized this world wasn't going far. I knew that I couldn't kill myself or I would answer to my adopted Dad. I wasn't willing to break his heart. The dark space disappeared when I met Paul. Paul was/is more vibrant than he ever gave himself credit.

We talked about the darkness again today.

I was edging towards Wiccan. Candles, an alter, small "spells" dressing in dark clothes.

What? Wait. Wiccan?

As close to it as I could. I believed there was a bigger force out there. (I know everyone feels God, even if they deny Him being there.)

Paul asked that I try brighter colours. Asked that I consider him an alternative to hopping the short bus or closing the book of life for good. (My adopted Dad's heart just wasn't cutting it anymore with what I was facing) Like everything else, addictions can be hard to break. Thus the soaps, candles, incense. Harmless, right? Is it? I was asking myself that when I stared at the soaps in the bathroom.

I still have my accumulation of Wiccan materials everywhere in the apartment. Maybe getting rid of it will help.

Thoughts On Waste

Thoughts Of Waste

I grew up in a highly complicated house. No one will admit, but the children of the matriarchal household were emotionally abused for years. I love my bio-parents. I just don't like them very much. I feel as if they both needed help.

If you were male, the matriarchal proposed to you that you were a slave. I recall for many years how my Mom would belittle my Dad. And if the trash needed taken out, she would pry, whine, gripe, harass until he finally got fed up and did it.

If you were female in this matriarchal home I grew up in, you were groomed to be a wife. The matriarch prefered you not leave said house until you were getting married. (then she would threaten to keep you from getting married if the man you loved was not made of money) You were harassed into learning how to cook, clean, make beds and rise against men.

I learned my lessons. But I never thought of my potential. I always tried to impress the matriarch. I learned what she had to teach, looked at the world through her warped perceptions and never thought of myself more than that. I found a love when I was fifteen with computers. The internet. Self taught in java script, html...I could dazzle the pants off people as I keyed up a website in about a minute. I would create graphics. I would play with any free graphics designer I could get to. I spent numurous hours playing with flaming text.com. HOURS.

My little rant here is this: Are we living up to our potential? Are we trying to learn something new every day? Paul and I had a discussion on this. We know that more than 90% of human life doesn't live up to their potential. God gives us free will. HE will dictate our lives. HE will make sure we follow HIS plans. But, God loves us to learn. I make this naive assumption because of how many lessons God gives us on a weekly (if not daily) basis.

It peeves me madly because I have a long list of people I know aren't living up to the potential God gave them at birth.

Case: Older Brother, Albert Jr: (I rant about him often)

At the age of sixteen, Albert Jr was in high school plays. He sang and if I'm thinking right, had someone offer him a scholarship in music to go through college. (Most memorable, Albert in a hand made polka dot bikini for the number named after the swimsuit!)

Then, he went to a local community college, had a nervous breakdown, went bald and suddenly changed. Personally, I think my brother needs a psychologist. And anger management.

Here are my reasons why:

Albert has been married twice. Both unsuccessful marriages. Why? Well, first, he picks them stupid and not willing to work. Ex-wife Shelly worked maybe a week. She quit because her "back hurt". This is the same woman who had her kids taken away from her because she couldn't support them. I actually liked Shelly, except she was an idiot. All things considered, I thought she would fix herself. That's just wishful thinking. Then there is the soon-to-be ex wife Cassie. I hated Cassie from the very beginning. There's just some people you get bad vibes from right away. I found out why. The girl is insane! She needs meds. LIke, seriously. No, doctors have said Cassie needs meds for her bi-polarizism. Example, she argued with someone on the phone, yanked the cord from the wall and threw it at my brother! WTF? Cassie was also unwilling to work. She worked with my brother at Burger King for three days then decided to quit.

Second reason the marriages failed? My brother has a nasty, nasty short temper. He also believes women belong bare footed, pregnant and the single cooker, cleaner, etc of the household. I learned this quickly watching him at his house when he was married to Shelly. He yelled at her for burning a meal he was going to serve us. (no kids so far, thank God)(still not divorced from his other wife and tries dating other girls. Claims to be a saved man too.)

Three: My brother has decided that he will work at Burger King until he dies. The man is soon to be 38 years old. He's worked at Burger King since he was seventeen! I mean, he left Burger King when he moved to Lyons, KS with his ex, but worked at Mcdonalds down there. STILL FAST FOOD! And he's not even management! He's a grunt! They tried promoting him, but Albert let the power go to his head and starting acting like he owned everyone!

Four: The man acts like he's eighteen. Seriously.

Five: No car. He's had his license since he was sixteen, wrecked two cars and has no car because his lifetime career at Burger King leaves him just enough to get his seizure medication (no medical insurance, so he pays full price) and then maybe, twenty dollars to last until the next paycheck. He gambles, so this is where the money that doesn't help pay rent at my folk's place or his pills goes.

Six: He lives with my parents! That boy has moved out and moved back in with my parents for the past six years. He lived with a friend and his family for about eight months until his temper got him kicked out. He lived with another friend for about six months until he got on their nerves. He lived with my sister (the one I helped move out and move to KC in August 2008) but owes them backrent, money for the damages he cause to their Dodge Neon and phone expenses for calling **x lines.

Now what makes me think Albert needs counseling? WELL, if all I have said wasn't enough, he wrote a blog (copied and pasted just the way he wrote it):

sometimes I wonder what life would be like if I didnt have a family tht supported me.Friends tht would always be there to back me up.My family has always been there and all and so has been my friends.But are they enough,No.I would love to have a woman in my life tht doesnt look for looks,wealth,or a car.The woman needs to accept me for me not for what I have.anyway,what I was saying is this,I was wondering why I am here on this earth,but I am not going to ask the person above why,he has his reasons why,and I have not found tht yet,but he will show me the way.I am pondering all this because I have had bad luck with women and friends and cant be a good judge of character.I was hoping if all u women,tht are on my friends list to figure it out for me.I know one will just want a lot of input on this.thanks for all of this.

to which little sister and I replied:

Albert...

Lecture time again...

Let me come right out with it: YOU'RE A F**NG IDIOT!

Now, let me elaborate:

You said on your myspace that a woman should love you for you. Only your sisters will do that. Even then, it's very hard. Now, do you want a wife, or another sister?

Speaking of sisterly love, Steffie and I took a poll down at the plaza for you. We tried to stick to single women, then realized you didn't have any preferences. We described your personality and current situation then asking which they would do if you asked them out: tell you to go f**k off or accept you are with no car, working at burger king, being currently married already, and living with your parents. The results are as follows: 15% said they would tell you to f**k off, 40% just looked at us weird and walked away. And the other 55% looked as if we were comedians. We consider these to be positive results that only 15% said no. Oh, there was a 0.00001% that actually thought about it for 2.2 seconds, but judging by the multi-colored hair and markings on her arms that resembled that of a drug addict, we decided she was not a reliable source.

Plain and simply put in response to your myspace post. REAL women (and I emphasize on the real part as I haven't considered anything you've married so far to be real) want a dependable male.

Allow me to explain. Money DOES NOT grow on trees. According to marriage counselers all over the world, money problems make up at least 75% of marriage problems. If either partner is stressed because of money, the relationship falters. No one wants to barely make it. You seem to pick women who can't hold a job. With this economy, women are truly wanting a male who will bring home the bacon to where maybe the woman's paycheck will be gravy money.

Looks ARE NOT everything. However, you better be great in all the other aspects of your life. I won't apologize for society as that is not my place. Society is shallow. Looks are everything to them. A woman wants a guy who is good looking or at least takes care of himself. I think my husband is great. Even if he grew a beard, was over 300 lbs and bucktoothed, I would love him still and would have chosen him because he has the rest of his life in check. He's kind, he respects women, he thinks of me first, he cooks, he cleans, he's into the 50/50 relationship and works hard. YOU, Albert Jr, are short tempered, lazy, refuse to find other work to sustain yourself, have no respect for women (remember that I have spoken to quite a few of your ex's via myspace), lack ambition to better yourself and have streetsmarts for the most part but lack the kind of book smarts that attract women.

Women do not want a guy who is living with his folks. Especially since, although you still think you are eighteen, you are almost fourty. By now, a woman would hope that you would have been living on your own for a long *ss time. And, maybe, just maybe, be able to show her your place and impress her with how clean it is. Women do check out the guy's apartment. We see it as a reflection of how you will treat us. (women also, for the most part, DO NOT want to hear about your ex's or hear that you are married. You proposed to *blah friend* and she's still married. If you are a saved man, you know that's taboo. You shouldn't re-marry nor ask anyone else to leave their mate for you. Nor should you be dating while you are still married as that is adultry. Via the Bible, I can already tell you that God is disappointed and is trying to teach you how to live right.)

I have sleep to get. I have a long weekend. You think about what I said. I will be on facebook should you ever want to chat and hear some more truths. Yes, I do know what I am talking about. I have been through ALOT more than you and that gives me more experience. I want my whole family to better themselves. I lecture you out of maybe, just maybe, bringing you to a better path.

That's end of case #1.

Second case:

My brother in law, M, that is married to my little sister. When I first met him, he was a workaholic. He worked as a car hop about 45-50 hours a week. He kept his apartment clean. He helpd make decisions and was an awesome guy.

I can't say I blame all of this on M. I blame my little sister too. However, M could have helped more.

M and my little sister were kicked out of their last apartment due to my little sister not paying rent. Like I said, not all M's fault. But he knew rent wasn't being paid and could have changed that. M also was working as a taxi driver making maybe $100-$150 every week.

When we generously moved M and my sister to KC (rented them a storage unit for all their things, rented a uhaul up in St Joseph to move them here with their stuff, allowed them to live with us from August to December) M was a jerk! He's never ever said thank you for helping us out. Or, thanks for being there. Nope. Just grumbles and a visible hate on for us.

M used to play his world of warcraft for hours too. When he lived with us, I would find him on the computer playing that stinking game at 6am when I was getting ready to leave for work. I would then come home and find him still on it!

M also didn't look seriously for a job until I yelled at him. I mean, I got in his face after taking three months of his sh** and told him I was tired of my little sister having to scrimp and save. I was tired of her barely making it and I wanted him to act like a man, get a pair and get a job. He finally got a job about a week later. At a restuarant doing dishes. For three hours a day. For three days a week. And when they offered him a promotion after 4 weeks, he turned them down because he didn't want to work that hard he told me. I yelled at him for that too.

Then, here's the kicker, M asked my sister if he could put his 2 weeks notice in after they finally found a small, run down house to move into because they couldn't get into a nicer place because of the multiple evictions they had that he didn't help them avoid by not pulling his financial weight. Little sister exploded and said no, he couldn't quit his job!

A month later, M thought he was sly and began giving away his hours at work to other people. My sister caught on and told him that he *had* to work. Then, his job stopped giving him the hours he needed and they fell behind on bills again (after they lived with us and caught up on the multiple bills there were behind on that totalled over $1000). My husband and I lectured him on the reason his job stopped giving him hours (after he came with my sister to dinner and whined to me on what his job was doing to him!): duh! His bosses caught on that he didn't want to work, obviously.

Last week, I got him a job interview at my workplace. All he had to do (and we gave him directions and he said he had it) was show up to the interview on time, look nice and do great on the interview. He was fifteen minutes late, I don't know if he looked good because when he saw my husband afterwards, he had on kaki pants and a shirt that wouldn't go with any tie.

Oi.

I digress. These are two examples of what I see on a daily basis. No one wants to work towards anything. No one wants to set goals for their lives. You set goals at your place of employment, yes? Life isn't different!

*shakes head*

Freaking Out

I've been under alot of stress recently. I wonder if that's why I refuse to relax. It's making me crazy.

Paul brought us to Clinton, MO to have a day off. I don't get that over a weekend unless someone harasses me.

It's 5:27am. I can't sleep.

Last night, I worried about some vitamins I left on the dresser for Paul to take that he never heard me mention, didn't take and I'm worried that my dumb*** cat will eat them. I mean, he never ever gets on the dresser. Why would I worry about that? Momma cat (aka Fubu) gets on the dresser, but won't eat human food, so I doubt she'd even give those pills a second glance.

Then, I woke up this morning at 3:38am scared that our furnace at the apt would have kicked on and set off the smoke alarm. (Burning dust in the vent = alarms going off. Has happened before since we don't run the furnace, we have lower cost, non-burning heaters to heat our apt) Why would that freak me out? The neighbors would be worried. The cats would be annoyed. But after a few minutes the alarms would stop. I turned the heaters off before we left because I was worried about leaving them run while we were gone. The cats have a place to stay warm. I left our aquariums with a low heat on their heater so they would be fine.

I can't wait for my sister to check my apt today. I mean, we left food for the cats. I know my sister will check the apt today. Why am I freaking out?

- Chelle